Hi readers, as per today’s topic I will be sharing about the neverending of blaming and breaking the cycle of it.
Why are humans are easily trapped in the blame cycle? Well since we are born we were been thrown into things that we can’t control.Race, gender, genetics and where you were born are some examples of it.
Another reason would be your upbringing. Your family, friends and the environment you grew up with will influence you, whether it is good or bad. For instance, your parents do not have a lot of money, so you were born in their experiences and views of poor handling of money and not taking risks to grow.
So, when these two kicked quite negatively, you will have this victim’s mentality. When anything goes wrong, you will always be the “victim”, not the culprit and start the blaming game.
“I am born to a poor family. I will never be rich”
I have been through this stage before as I have been bullied since young. And ya been bullied is one of the thrown things in your life. I blamed everyone and everything back then.
When people keep blaming, they are not progressing and improving as a person. They are like riding a merry go round in the theme park, keep spinning. With that, there was no improvement and still on the same ground.
Bobby is an employee working as a marketing executive. He reports to his manager Adria for his job responsibilities.
Bobby was assigned for a project which consists of other regional offices involved on in. Adria would let him run the whole project himself freely.
One day, Adria briefly evaluate through the project and found out that either thing was doing halfway or basic errors, and is approaching the dateline.
Adria would eventually call him to her office and question him. Bobby kept blaming the other regional offices and do not admit the mistakes that he made. After that Adria would ask Bobby to leave the office and check with the regional offices for verification.
After a few days, Adria again asks him to come to her office. This time Adria past Booby with a letter and said, “ I am very disappointed in you Booby, I would have given you a chance if you are honest and admit your mistakes, instead you are blaming on everything. How could I trust you handling things moving forward? I had no choice but to tell you that today will be your last day.”
So as from the story above, blaming not only keeps you going around, it also makes people have doubts on you. They just can’t trust you and worse, disrespect you.
Why do people still blaming in spite of that?
- It is an excellent defence mechanism.
We humans have a natural act of defence to prevent ourselves from being hurt. Blaming is one of it to help to preserve your self-esteem, which it also acts to cover your own flaws and shortcomings.
- To run away from responsibilities
Blaming is always an easy out. It diverts the faults ( mostly from themselves ) to other people and hurt them. In fact, they are running away from their faults and do not want to take responsibility for it.
- Being right
There are types of people who want to be always right, to the point of they cannot be wrong. Even if they are wrong, they justified themselves that they are right and start blaming.
So how do you break the cycle? First I would say will be practising self-awareness, next would be this keyword: Acceptance.
Accept that who you are, understand your strengths and flaws. From there work on it and find ways to grow within yourself.
Accept that what’s life thrown into you (however not to the point of self-defeat). Improve on it and live a life from its grasp.
Blaming doesn’t solve issues, they just kept worse on everything. So get up and break the cycle out of it.
“Acceptance doesn’t mean you agree or give up; it means you accept something for what it is and what it’s not. Acceptance is the gateway to change.”
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